Identity
Daidoji Hidehisa never had been at the Carpenter Wall. He only imagined how it could be, and sometimes in his dreams, he'd be granted the opportunity of gloriously serving in a Daidoji troop assigned to the legendary Last Stand against the Forces of Shadowlands. He, however, lived a rather mediocre (for his standards) life, serving as yojimbo to a fat Doji bureaucrat in one of the southern cities of the Crane. Hidehisa was betrothed to Daidoji Mariko, but their engagement was to him something boring and uninteresting. They were betrothed to each other for so long that she was no mystery for him. A series of minor events delayed their marriage and for the yojimbo, it seemed just right; as if was the way things must be. Just ok and plain as everything else in his life.
Everything changed when he was accompanying his charge to a brothel. The Doji was fond of this sort of place. There, a woman smiled to Hidehisa, and said: "Are you now a Daidoji, Ryoma-sama? What a surprise!"
Hidehisa, of course, thought the woman was crazy, drunken or both. But his ego won the battle against disbelief, and he told her he was a born Daidoji; he told her his name and the name of his parents. She was a cheap prostitute and didn't insist, just apologized for her mistake, saying briefly she knew someone that was so alike to him that could be his twin brother.
He of course smiled and dismissed the idea, but this information didn't leave his mind for the following week. He returned to the brothel and talked to the lady again, but all she could tell him was that she met this "Hiruma Ryoma" in Clearwater Village. He was a frequent client of the house she used to work in. She said Ryoma was alike to Hidehisa and every aspect, at least dressed, but she could say if they were alike in other aspects too, and she said it with an inviting smile. Hidehisa was intrigued enough to accept her invitation, not out of desire, but curiosity. When he took off his clothes, she gasped and said: "You not only have Ryoma-sama's physique and voice, but every scar and mole… Please don't kill me, Ryoma-sama, I don't know your reasons, but your secret is safe with me. I have a daughter to feed; I have reasons to be faithful to my promise."
It disturbed Hidehisa greatly. He left in a hurry, and all he could think was about a man in Clearwater Village walking around with his very appearance.
In the next months it became an obsession. He needed to go to Clearwater Village and find this man. Calling all favors he could have, he managed to get assigned to a detachment in the Carpenter Wall after his wedding. So it went: he finally married Mariko and both went to live in Crab lands. They had a little house in Clearwater Village. Mariko wasn't content with the arrangements her husband made to their lives, but she didn't know better his intentions or plans. When he returned home in his weekly leave, he spent most of his time wandering by the city and trying to find "Hiruma Ryoma" or information about him.
Hidehisa wasn't affected by his experiences serving in the Wall; the idea of having a double was too disturbing to him. After a few months in the Wall, someone thought he was Hiruma Ryoma; asked for his wife and how things were going in the Eastern Side of Yasuki Yashiki. That's how he learned where Ryoma lived. Hidehisa, however, instead of denying being Ryoma, just went along with the farce, pretending to be the Hiruma and replying the Crab soldier with generic responses.
In his next leave, Hidehisa put a jade pendant in his neck and then got a ship ride and went to the other side of the bay. In his way to Ryoma's house, he was several times mistaken by the Hiruma samurai. Each time, he pretended to be the other man.
Asking for "his own house direction's" was a bit strange, so he pretended to be drunken. The heimin were lenient to the "drunken Hiruma". He was taken to his house and a young servant took him in. "His spouse" was intrigued to see him so early at home. She was beautiful and docile. She prepared a hot bath to him, and food, and didn't mind he was silent all the time. She invited him to their bedroom, and Hidehisa didn't resist her sweet presence. He made love to Ryoma's wife, and before the night fell, he left. Ryoma's wife didn't seem to notice any difference between her husband and this imposter.
Those events, however, sunk in his soul and he felt guilty. During his way back home Hidehisa thought he was slowing sinking into insanity. It was impossible that could have been two identical men, with the same moles and scars, living different lives altogether. They physical resemblance could be explained by being identical twin brothers; but it didn't explain the same scar and moles. He must find Ryoma: see him. Could Ryoma be a shapeshifter?
The next day he wrote a letter to Hiruma Ryoma, and sent to his house. It explained he was often mistaken with the Hiruma, and thought they must be twins. Hidehisa requested to have a meeting with the Hiruma samurai. The reply came soon: they could indeed meet in a secluded place in Clearwater Village.
Their reunion was astonishing. Ryoma couldn't believe he was seeing a mirrored image of himself, neither could Hidehisa. Hiruma Ryoma poked the Daidoji with a jade pointed dagger, Hidehisa tested the Hiruma as well. Neither reacted to jade or crystal. It was unbelievable.
"My spouse said "I" visited her last week in an unscheduled day." The Hiruma finally said, somber.
Hidehisa gasped and couldn't help but confirm, apologizing in the process. He was ready to a duel, but it wasn't what the Hiruma proposed. Instead, Ryoma said. "You owe me. I will have my "quality time" with your spouse as you have with mine. Then we'll be even and I hope to never see or hear of you again."
Not pleased at all, but forced by his "double"'s sense of justice and his own guilty, Hidehisa agreed. They exchanged their clothes and accessories, and Hiruma Ryoma marched to Hidehisa's house, to have his time with Hidehisa's wife pretending to be him.
As the hours passed and Hidehisa waited, however, he couldn't help but feel usurped and misgiven. He couldn't help but be sure that his wife, Mariko, wouldn't distinguish Ryoma from him, and it made him angry. He hadn't any distinct characteristic of his own, and it was terrifying. His life wasn't him anymore. And he felt like without identity, using other men's clothes and in a limbo, waiting him to return and give him life back after using a bit of it.
He decided to come to Ryoma's house and see Hiruma Hatsume again. He really hadn't a real plan to justify his move, only a vague idea that maybe this time she could point out something different. It was a decision made out of jealousy, hate, and fear. He wasn't a perfect samurai neither was his double, but he was desperately to possess even a tiny bit of individuality.
He returned to Ryoma's house and had a dinner to Hatsume. They talked a bit about some things, about their property and what was needed to make it better. They talked about other things as well, and Ryoma thought it was easy to talk to this sweet lady. Hatsume was delighted that Ryoma was finally growing up and stopped acting like hating being married. Then she went to sleep and Hidehisa stayed awake, ready to come back to the place where he and Ryoma would exchange clothes and return to their lives.
Hiruma Ryoma came to Hidehisa's house and met the Daidoji's wife. She was beautiful and intriguing. He liked her. If he could keep silent and avoid saying anything revealing, he was sure she couldn't distinguish him from her husband. At first, he indeed got scared, them angry, with Hidehisa's existence. The man came to his house and got laid with his wife. He could kill him, and in fact, he was going to kill Hidehisa soon. But not tonight, because he could get laid to Hidehisa's wife first.
Mariko was flattered. "Hidehisa" was being romantic tonight. Silent as always, but his glances when she served him the dinner, the way he subtly touched her ankle and let it go… He was in the mood and she felt desired. Hidehisa was always absentminded, always somber and bland towards her… when they went to the bedroom however she started to feel uneasy… She couldn't tell exactly why, but she felt violated, she felt terrified. Sliding her hand to her hairpin she delved it in the imposter's throat with all strength she possessed. Ryoma was taken by surprise but reacted, reaching for his wakizashi next to the bed and burying it in Mariko's chest almost immediately. He was a mighty warrior but not even he could survive to thatsort of injury. In the sunrise Mariko's servant found both her mistress and master dead in the bedroom. Later in the day the magistrates said both have killed each other for unknown reasons.
Hidehisa waited for hours but Ryoma didn't come. Fearing the worst, he returned to Clearwater Village and even before coming home, he listened to the gossips about the Daidoji couple who killed each other in the night before.
He was shocked; it was his fault and he knew it. Then he came to the realization that "Daidoji Hidehisa" was officially dead. Only "Hiruma Ryoma" was alive. It was a nightmare. He lost his identity even at the eyes of the Empire. For a moment, his conscience overcame his confusion and he thought about Hatsume's singular situation. Once again, he came to her house, this time to tell her the whole truth and after that, commit sepukku for his misdeeds towards her.
Hatsume listened to his crazy story. She pondered for a while and analyzed her options; his options. Then she said. "Stay. Be Ryoma. Be my husband."
He stayed. He became Ryoma. Hatsume didn't become a widow afterall. They never again talked about Hidehisa. He was Hiruma Ryoma, serving on the Carpenter Wall, and married to Hatsume. She's even got pregnant to her husband months after.
One day, he received a letter. It was from a man called Tsuruchi Morihito. The man said he discovered to possess a strong resemblance to Ryoma, in a way everyone would mistaken both. This Morihito was requesting a meeting…
Based in José Saramago's "O Homem Duplicado"